Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Resolve To Evolve

Simply put, effective and productive communication means...

---(-)-> Understanding that communication means receiving input not just giving output
---(-)-> Possessing thorough knowledge of facts to support your position
---(-)-> Being able to see things from the other person's point of view
---(-)-> Having an open mind to consider possibilities other than what you believe
---(-)-> Conveying your thoughts in a way that is easy to understand
---(-)-> Pursuing opportunities to learn
---(-)-> Making a solution the goal, not being right


Anonymous said...


This puts proper communication principles right where they need to be.

A most excellent list - Think I'll print it out and tape it on me wall.



Queen of everything said...

Simple, yet so true it pains me to read it.

chainedjoule said...

Hi Kilroy

I like, but . . . sometimes the goal of communication isn't a 'solution' or being right. We don't always communicate to solve. We communicate to convey many things - thoughts, feelings, etc. And, we communicate not just through words and not always through many words. We communicate through touch, smiles, physical stance, volume, and etc.

Your piece is succinct and pushes me to think. Thank you.


Anonymous said...

"Making a solution the goal, not being right". . .I like that. We have to determine what is really important, and what is going to get needs met. Being right seldom meets either criteria.

Unknown said...

This list, of course is spot on. Not many people can do it though. To argue well takes a lot of maturity and I believe it is a learned thing and takes lots of practice. It is learned in leadership classes.

Timothy B. Hurst said...

Well put.

I think Penny makes a valid point. And I will take it in another direction. Having a 'position' on something can often mean you are fixed, or unwilling to create something new (a new position, if you will). If you are less constrained by the language of positions, then you might be more willing to look at things (problems/solutions/other people/yourself) differently.

Just a thought.

Anonymous said...

How about using of proper gestures as a way of effective communication as well? Could it be part of the list?

Anonymous said...

Excellent list on communication. I think everyone needs good communication skills to succeed at almost anything. Thanks for the great post.

EarthBound said...

Hey Kilroy,

THis this list is fantastic, as its all encompassing to the notion of having a 'productive' form of communication on any level.

I'll try and make it brief and concise.
At the end of the day, communication is technically passing along information from A to B. Whether it be - thoughts, feelings, and as Penny said; "..We communicate through touch, smiles, physical stance, volume, and etc," and verbally, of course.

However, the 'solution' is in essence how the recipient receives and responds to the communicative element. Again, whether it be a physical stance, volume, a frown..etc

Many of us can easily point the finger and state how we perceive others' characteristic faults, but for most it's difficult to look in the mirror and honestly do the same.

I reckon that this list exemplifies a more profound awareness into any form of communication too.
For example:
---(-)-> Conveying your thoughts in a way that is easy to understand"
Adding to what Penny said earlier, even a stance can portray such disastrous 'solution', or vibe... if one is not aware of their own body language, then the solution of how they feel will not be equivalent to what they are projecting. [ie. if someone is shy, they may signal arrogance by lack of eye contact]

Also,---(-)-> Making a solution the goal, not being right"
So, you can bring as much information to the table about a certain subject, but what someone is feeling needs to be accessed as part of communication- after all, feelings are not right or wrong, as it's still information being passed along.

What is more, things like touch, smiles, volume can not necessarily be assessed over a screen. In that case, the list compiles a great way to think about how to express yourself so that the solution derives to a two way 'conversation'.

Sure is a great start to learn to Resolve to Evolve.

Anonymous said...

All couples should use this! Thanks for sharing!

Anonymous said...

I like your combination of a resolution to evolve (as in the will to make a choice) with a few means of effective communication. Which taken together, imply that there needs to be a willingness to override any selfishness or even ego, so that all parties involved in the conversation can deliberate or communicate without deteriorating into mindless conflict or uninformed discussion, allowing an open flow of ideas, thoughts, and opinions. It takes a conscious effort on all parties involved in order to communicate well with one another.

Anonymous said...

Boy, you've hit the it on the nose here! Very true and great tips to communicate by!

Kimberly :)